And time goes on
by Darke Eco Freak
Summary: Hate and Love, Love and Hate. So easily confused, especially when you're these two, Earl Phantomhive and Master Sebastian. Do I hate him, or do I love him?


**DEF: This is my first time writing for Kuroshitsuji but I've watched the anime and am currently trying to procure all the manga volumes so I thought why not?**

_Vita: I've always loved Sebastian personally, but Robi likes Ciel more, I guess it's cause she can play up the angst she like so much with his character. We do not own the smexy butler, or his adorable master, but we are looking into summoning up a demon of our own._

* * *

Sometimes I think I hate him. I mean, wouldn't you if you'd contracted yourself, thinking it would only be for a certain amount of time before you were rewarded, only to find out you could never escape?

I sighed, but I loved him, I hadn't even known it was possible for creatures such as I to love. This petty emotion, it had snuck up on me like a deadly cancer, too far along to be killed by the time I realized it was even there. Could he love me in return though? I was a vile demon, I'd snatched away his life from out under him. Sure he'd said he loved me but that had been while the contract lasted and we both thought we wouldn't have another chance to say it.

What a cruel joke this was, we were bound for all eternity now. Forever, master and servant, while the human world changed and glorious London crumbled away to nothing, we would remain the same. Both demons stuck in a contract that was only beneficial to one party, both cursed to spend the rest of eternity together.

How would I ever know if his love was true if we were bound as such? He might very well lie as a way of making it easier on the both of us. Hell knew he'd lived a harsh enough life, a life that was now burdened by myself. Earl Phantomhive and Master Butler, never would that change, but maybe one of us would.

The Earl was a most formidable noble while Master Butler was an overly experienced and manipulative servant at Earl Phantomhive's disposal. Together, the pair was unstoppable, how very tiresome. Lau and his rumors no doubt, sometimes I wonder why I'd hesitated to kill him, perhaps I had become soft and too accustomed to the opium dealer.

"Sebastian come to me now."

"My Lord."

"We have a guest coming, I want the gardens completely redone, he is Spanish, make the proper arrangements."

"Yes, my Lord. Dinner shall be served in the garden at half six."

We parted neutrally, one to his duty, the other left by his lonesome. I often wondered what life would have gone on to be if neither one of us had ever met Alois Trancy. That sadistic little brat who thought it'd be fun to play around with souls and steal another person's prey, well that hadn't been Trancy more his own demonic butler Claude.

Many said Claude had once been christened Mephistopheles and bet against God while using a mortal man named Faust. Personally I didn't believe that story, no matter how many lesser demons swore it was true, Claude was a spider, Mephistopheles hated spiders. Or so I'd been told by reliable sources.

Did it make me a bad person to hate the one whom I'd professed to love? Not that I much cared for other's opinion of me anymore but still. He was just so very perfect all the time!

He never made the slightest mistake, never so much as a hair out of place on his black, black head. He performed flawlessly at anything that caught his attention, was that not daunting? When you were expected to live up to someone so seamless and you were so obviously sub par.

He was the most precious and treasured jewel upon the crown of the King, while I was a tarnished bit of silver that had become molted with age. He was the perfect anything you could possibly think of, I wasn't even fit to play in his shadow, long though it was, dark though it was.

If he were the image, I was the bloodied and broken reflection, I pressed the back of my palm to my eye, the contract that bound us together, the very thing that has made me hate a once lover. The clock in the hall began to chime six, half an hour more before dinner, and what shall I do until then?

I lifted the instrument I had learnt to play so long ago from the velvet case it had come in, stroking my fingers along the strings, the violin, the devil's instrument. I propped it under my chin and raised the bow loftily as I had been taught, bringing it up to feather along the strings. The tune I played was sad but prideful, arrogant you might say, I didn't much care, I let the music make itself, let the wash of emotion bleed itself out in a tune.

For I was Earl Ciel Phantomhive, the Head of the Funtom Company, and emotion would only hold me back, demon or not, I'd learnt young that feelings would only lead to heartbreak and desperation. I know not which emotion I exorcised as I played, be it the love or the hate, only that the bow tugged on not only the violin but my cold, dead heart as well.

* * *

**DEF: Yeah, while I was writing this today, I was continually interrupted by teachers trying to teach, first day back and all that. As such I continually forgot who's pov this was in, Ciel's or Sebastian, but now that I look at it, it implies both of them and I like that, so I leave as is.**

_Vita: Of course Robs, you go to school to write Kuroshitsuji fanfiction, not to learn or anything. Anyway, reviews are most welcome as this is her first shot at Ciel's character._**  
**


End file.
